Deepali Polekar
updated: 26 weeks and 4 days ago
23 years, Female, Pune, Maharashtra, IN
Favorite Artists:
Sonu Nigam
Artists I hate:
Rakhi Sawant
About Me:
The road to success is not straight... there is a curve called failure, a loop called confusion, speed bumps called bad friends, red lights called enemies, caution lights called family, u'll have flat tyre called jobs. But if u have a spare wheel called determination, an engine called perseverance, insurance called faith & a driver called GOD; u'll make it to a place called SUCCESS!
More about me
Birthday:
04 August
Location:
Pune, Maharashtra, IN, 411030
umesh projects ongoing
10 weeks and 1 day ago
wishing u shining,cracking this diwali and prosperous new year.
krishh heda
29 weeks and 20 hours ago
1 banda bhahta howa aata hay
aur Santa se kehta hai
bhai jaldi jao tumharey ghar main
talaab ka pani ghus gaya hay.
Santa: Oye kion jhoot bolta hay,
ghar ki chabi to meray paas hay
-------------------
Santa bar me ro raha tha.
Bartender: Kyo ro rahe ho?
Santa: Aur kya karu??
Jis ladki ko bhulana chahta hun
uska naam hi yaad nahi aata.
-------------------
Santa Police se:
Kal rat chor mere ghar se
TV ke Ilaaava sab samaan le gaye
Police:TV kyon nahi legaya??
Santa:TV to me dekh raha tha is liye..
-------------------
Thappar Maarnay par NaraZ Wife
se Husband bola:
“Aadmi usi ko maarta hai jis se Pyaar krta hai.”
Wife ne Husband ko 2 thappar maaray aur
Boli “Aap kya samajhtay hain main Aapse Pyaar nahi kerti”
-------------------
Husband: Kal mere khawab main ek larki aye thi.
Wah! Kia Larki thee!
Wife: Akeli ayee hogi?
Husband: Tum ko kese pata?
Wife: Uska Husband mere khawab main aya tha!
------------------
krishh heda
29 weeks and 2 days ago
Santa goes to consult a famous specialist about his medical problem.
"How much do I owe you?"
"My fee is Rs 500," replies the physician.
"Five hundred? That`s impossible."
"In your case," the doctor replies, "I suppose I could adjust my fee to Rs 300."
"Three hundred for one visit? Ridiculous."
"Well, then, could you afford Two hundred?"
"Who has so much money?"
"Look," replies the doctor, growing irritated, "Just give me Fifty rupees and be gone."
"I can give you Twenty rupees only." says Santa, "Take it or leave it."
"I don`t understand you," says the doctor. "Why did you come to the most expensive doctor in This Friggin` town?"
"Listen, Doctor," says Santa. "When it comes to my health, nothing is too expensive."
krishh heda
30 weeks and 12 hours ago
Ek admi aadi raat ko apni moti biwi se bola ki sisak sisak ke marna theek hai ya ek dum.
BIWI : Ek dum.
Aadmi : To apni dusri tang bhi mujh per rakh do.
~~~~~~~~~
Science teacher : agar kisi ladki ko mirgi ka attack ho to use lambe time tak kiss karo isse wo thik ho jayegi.
Student : par sir use attack kaise dilaya jaye?.
~~~~~~~~~
krishh heda
30 weeks and 4 days ago
A man was brought in to the hospital intensive care unit ward, put in a bed tubes coming out everywhere. A week later, another man was admitted, in a similar condition.
Both lay there, machines pinging, tubes poking etc. A couple more weeks before one of them had the strength to raise his hand and point to himself and say, "Bengali."
The other patient signaled he had heard, raised his own hand, and said, "Punjabi."
This act tired them out so badly it was a week before the first summoned up the strength to say, "Calcutta."
Other replied in a weedy frail voice, "Ludhiana."
Once more, the strain was too much for them both and they passed out. Days passed before the first patient managed to again point to himself and say, "Asit."
Replied the other, "Santa."
A few hours later, Asit managed to point to himself again and rasp out weakly, "Cancer."
Santa responded, "Sagittarius."
krishh heda
30 weeks and 5 days ago
Once in a kindergarten, a teacher asked all students to write an essay on the topic "A Poor Family". One student gets the lowest marks for writing that essay. The student happens to be the richest girl in the entire class and her essay goes on as.......
She wrote:
Ek baar ek bahut hee gareeb family thi, husband aur wife dono gareeb they, do bachey they, woh bhi bahut gareeb they!!
Ghar ke saare naukar bhi gareeb they, ghar ka maali, driver, aur guard bhi bahut gareeb they. Ghar ke 4 kuttey bhi gareeb they, 2 din sey chicken nahi khaaya tha.
3 mercedeez car thi, unki bahut time se servicing nahi hui thi, ghar ka A.C bhi theek nahi chalta tha, aur uppar se ghar mein 1 saal se paint nahi hua tha!!
Family ko holiday ke liye foregin country gaye bhi 6 mahiney ho gaye they, Ghar ke 5 mein sey 2 TV to chaltey hee nahi they!!!
All in all, bahut hi gareeb family thi!!
~~~~~~~~
krishh heda
30 weeks and 5 days ago
Dentist: I have to pull the aching tooth, it will take just five minutes.
Patient: And how much will it cost?
Dentist: It's 2000 Rs.
Patient: 2000 Rs. for just a few minutes work???
Dentist: I can extract it very slowly if you like.
~~~~~~~~~
A new client meets a famous lawyer.
Client: Can you tell me how much do you charge?
Lawyer: I charge 10000 to answer three questions!
Client: Well that's a bit steep, isn't it?
Lawyer: Yes it is, and what's your third question?
~~~~~~~~~
The Difference Between Dogs and Cats
A dog thinks: My owners feed me, love me, provide me with a nice house, and take good care of me ... They must be gods!
A cat thinks: My owners feed me, love me, provide me with a nice house and take good care of me ... I must be a god!
~~~~~~~~~
krishh heda
30 weeks and 6 days ago
Lady : Is this my train?
Station Master : No, it belongs to the Railway Company.
Lady : Don't try to be funny. I mean to ask if I can take this train to New Delhi.
Station Master : No Madam, I'm afraid it's too heavy.
~~~~~~
Customer:Waiter, there's a dead beetle in my soup.
Waiter:Yes sir, they are not very good swimmers.
~~~~~~
Customer:Waiter, there's a fly in my soup.
Waiter:That' s all right sir, he won't drink much.
~~~~~~
Customer:Waiter, there's a fly swimming in my soup.
Waiter: So what do you expect me to do, call a lifeguard?
~~~~~~~
Customer :Waiter, what's the meaning of this fly in my tea up?
Waiter :I wouldn't know sir, I'm a waiter, not a fortune teller.
~~~~~~~~
Man: How old is your father?
Boy: As old as me.
Man : How can that be?
Boy: He became a father only when I was born.
~~~~~~~~~
Customer:Waiter, this soup tastes funny.
Waiter: Funny? But then why aren't you laughing?
~~~~~~~
krishh heda
31 weeks and 19 hours ago
Kaha Hoo SunShine...?
No Contact since so long time ?
krishh heda
31 weeks and 19 hours ago
Aaj tak gets news that 100 sardars are killed in a train accident at
Amritsar station.Only one sardar left alive.
The correspondent goes to him and asks the sardar ji.
Correspondent: How did it happen?
Sardar: oh ji pucho mat.. sab kuch sahi tha sab log platform par khade
gaadi ki wait kar rahe they. Achanak announcement hui ki shatabdee
express 2 no. platform par aa rahi hai.Jaise hi sab ne suna ki gaddi
PLATFORM PAR aa rahi hai, sab log apni jaan bachane ke liye patri par
kood gaye. Aur tabhi gaddi patri par aa gayi.
Correspondent: Thank god. Aap ne samajhdari dikhayee. Aap patri par
nahin koode.
Sardar: o nahin ji main to suicide karne ki liye patri par hi leta
Tha. Jaise hi announcement hui main to platform par chad gaya.
Ayub Shaikh
31 weeks and 2 days ago
Hey Deepali This mDIng is Only For Joking Iska Galat Matlab Nahi Nikalna Kya ?
Just Joking From Ayub Bhai